Marlin is at her appointment with her relationship therapist, Dr. Yulie McNeil. She's been seeing Dr. McNeil for months to deal with her issue of being desperate to get married. She made a break through by recognizing her mother's pressure to get married hasn't been helpful. Her mother projected her own insecurities onto Marlin, although she is in a rather lack luster marriage with Marlin's father.
Fortunately, Marlin has been progressing well and, although she was nervous about dating again, she has started dating Brett. It's been pretty slow, but that's good for Marlin. Brett hasn't been in a rush, as long as they can spend time together. Let's see how things go at this appointment.
Marlin: Yes, she's doing better. At least a little better. When she starts down that road with me, I have the strength to tell her that I don't want to talk about it and I will figure it out for myself. I'm glad I can finally do that and not allow her to make me feel guilty.
Dr. McNeil: That's good. How does that make you feel about your ability to communicate with your mother?
Marlin: I actually feel empowered. I don't think I've ever felt like an adult with her until now. I'm really proud of myself.
Dr. McNeil: You should be. You've come a long way. What challenges do you think you still face with regards to your relationship with your mother?
Marlin: I haven't been able to tell her I have started dating. I feel like sharing that will just give her ammunition to try to push the marriage agenda even more. Without that information, she seems easier for me stand up to. Does that make sense?
Dr. McNeil: Absolutely. You believe that sharing this information gives her encouragement and excitement to be hopeful you are closer to what she's been trying to get you to do, regardless of what you want. Is that correct?
Marlin: I like the way you put it. Yes, I just need to keep her calm for at least two reasons. I need more strength to stand up against more pushing and I don't want to let my own mind start running away with thoughts of marriage right now.
Dr. McNeil: Then you feel like you're willing to give this new opportunity with the gentleman you are seeing more time to develop before thinking about a larger step?
Dr. McNeil: Mmmm...What made you surprised?
Marlin: We work together and we've been friends for a while. Well, there's three of us in particular at work who hang out. Not that we don't talk to other people at work, but the three of us just hit it off.
Dr. McNeil: Who is the third person?
Marlin: Bryce. He's so cool to hang out with.
Dr. McNeil: Have you had romantic feelings for Bryce?
Marlin (looking shocked): No. He's the brother I never had. He is so calm, yet he loves the ladies. He's such a flirt with all the young ladies. There is no way I could take him seriously. But I do love him as a brother. He talked me into dating Brett.
Dr. McNeil: How do you feel about that?
Marlin: I feel like Bryce saw something in me and Brett he thought would work together. I respect that he gave me a little push to at least give Brett a chance.
Dr. McNeil: It sounds like Bryce has been a good friend to you.
Marlin (smiling): Yes, he has.
Dr. McNeil: Let's talk some more about Brett. Are you attracted to him?
Marlin: Yes, I think he's attractive. I really like spending time with him.
Dr. McNeil: That's a good start. How does he treat you?
Marlin: He listens to me and checks on me to be sure I'm okay. Even if we can't talk on the phone, he will send me a text to say 'hello.' I like that.
Dr. McNeil: He certainly seems very attentive. At this point, do you want to continue to build your relationship with him to see where things go?
Marlin: Yes. I haven't seen anything that would make me be concerned. I'm just balancing what I've been learning with what's going on between us.
Dr. McNeil: Have you been physically intimate yet?
Marlin (blushing): Oh my goodness. No.
Dr. McNeil: It's good you take your time so that you don't confuse your real feelings with feelings driven by physical connection. You could consider waiting until you are sure about the state and direction of your relationship.
Marlin: Yes, I think you're right. Brett is such a gentleman, he's never mentioned it, so I know he's not rushing.
Marlin: Yes, I can do that. I can stay strong and thing about what I want.
Dr. McNeil: Good. Now I would like to talk about some of the other things you've been doing to work on yourself.
Well, we'll let Marlin and Dr. McNeil continue the rest of the session. I'm hoping we can catch up with some other residents over the next week. Lots going on. Stay tuned.
Thanks for stopping by. ~ Jaye